Changing Lanes at the apex

Brought to you by Rainbow Dark

I Miss you Christian!

When I went to bed last night at 7:30 I laid in the half awake state thinking. I thought of a lot of things I could write about but I didn't want to wake up enough to jot them down.
I've been very busy these last few weeks because my counterpart Elaine has been off. She took a two week trip to Guatamala to save the world. I think she could have taken a two week trip to the ghetto in Washington, DC and found children in worse conditions to save. But that is just my opinion.

It's been almost a year since my Father passed. My stomach hits the floor when I think how long it's been without him. The time of year, sites, sounds, smells, weather all remind me of the grief I went through last year. Sometimes, I think I smell the hospital. You know the smell I mean. If you spent enough time in one there is a certain smell to it. Every once in a while the smell will hit me and I think of the past. I'm not sure what this next month is going to be like for me. As for now, I'm treading water. I'm feeling that holding pattern that I remember writing about last year, watching and waiting. For what? I don't know. I sometimes think about going back and reading my entries from last year. But I know that will only enrage me and put me in a lot of pain. But on the other hand there is something inside me that doesn't want to forget. I'm reluctent to let go. I could just delete them, but I'm inclined to print them, and all of my entries and save them. After all, journaling has saved my life, for what its worth.

That's really all I have time to write about today. One of these days.. I swear... I'm going to come up with something interesting or at least put an interesting spin on something to write about. Jock and Quindigo always put such a great spin on things. Hum drum everyday life becomes Ghetto Fabulous through their writing.

C~ ya